Kristy McMorlan's Family Photo Gallery

  1. Kristy's dad, as a young boy, and his family
    Kristy's dad, as a young boy, and his family
  2. Kristy's mother's drawing while in school.
    Kristy's mother's drawing while in school.
  3. Kristy's dad served on WWII PT Boat.
    Kristy's dad served on WWII PT Boat.
  4. One of Kristy's family's Trunk photo.
    One of Kristy's family's Trunk photo.
  5. Kristy's parents while dating.
    Kristy's parents while dating.
  6. Kristy's mother as a young woman.
    Kristy's mother as a young woman.
  7. Kristy's mother at age fourteen.
    Kristy's mother at age fourteen.
  8. A drawing Kristy McMorlan's mother did.
    A drawing Kristy McMorlan's mother did.
  9. Kristy's McMorlan's mother.
    Kristy's McMorlan's mother.
  10. The mysterious Aunt Clara as a young woman.
    The mysterious Aunt Clara as a young woman.
  11. Kristy McMorlan and her stuffed dog.
    Kristy McMorlan and her stuffed dog.
  12. Kristy's father as a young boy.
    Kristy's father as a young boy.
  13. Kristy's great-uncle and grandfather
    Kristy's great-uncle and grandfather
  14. Kristy's father as a young man.
    Kristy's father as a young man.
  15. Kristy's family's photo.
    Kristy's family's photo.
Book Excerpts
1-"I’m not who I once was. Isn’t that a foundational belief of our Christian faith? Change is inevitable. Growth is sought after. Repentance is a doorway to Grace. Real change begins with admitting a need for Grace. Denial blocks Grace. Unless a person acknowledges the problem, there is no hope for a cure, recovery, resolution, or healing."
-McMorlan, K. (2018) "TREASURES In The Trash" Chapter 1 Understand Patterns

2-"The truth is I had amnesia, I believe as a result of Mom’s mental health condition. I likewise was traumatized by Dad as well as my ex-church leadership. I had repressed memories due to childhood trauma. When I discovered this, I was a little prejudiced in my own thinking, wanting to keep the secret to myself. I didn’t want labels, judgments, pity, or especially condemnation. My childhood was bad enough with the parts I could remember; whatever happened in the parts I couldn’t remember frightened me. I wasn’t fine, but if I was asked, “How are you?”  I’d answer, “I'm fine,” because I needed time to process and accept it myself before I could expect others to accept it. I asked myself, “If I was narrow-minded in my own eyes, how was I ever going to step out of my own denial?” “The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”"  Exodus 14:14 (NIV)
-McMorlan, K. (2018) "TREASURES In The Trash" Chapter 2 The I'm Fine Lie

3-"Dad frequently sought his own desires, rather than stepping back and being mindful of Mom’s and his children’s needs. In my opinion, medication and alcohol shouldn’t have been mixed. Period. My parents’ priorities were unwholesome, and my childhood had lots of crazy mixed messages to sift through, in part because there eventually were four sides to Mom. 
  • -The one who was funny, personable, and creative. Mom could make the yummiest pie you ever had! Mom had a great smile. 

  • -The confrontational woman, which I still don’t think is always a bad thing. She could think on her feet and got things done. 

  • -The woman who sat in a darkened room and pulled the blinds. This woman stayed hidden away, with little interest or interaction with others. She had a hearing impairment, which I believe influenced her decisions and eventual outcome.
  • -The woman who had five friends only she could see, because after a while some kind of mental disassociation arose. Possibly because her medication and alcohol shouldn’t have been mixed, and her abuse, which probably never got put in its proper place."  
-McMorlan, K. (2018) "TREASURES In The Trash" Chapter 10 Reactiveness
4-"The elephant that lives in the living room, which everyone feeds but ignores, is generally on a rampage destroying people, places, and things. I can see it but do nothing about it, as it decomposes onto my life, depositing corrosive material into my life. It frequently brings my life to a mere shadow of what I believe it could have been, because the elephant in the living room goes unidentified and others accommodate it. Why couldn’t something similar occur within a religious environment; I believe it did."
-McMrorlan, K. (2018) "TREASURES In The Trash" Chapter 13 Unhealthy Guidance

5-"In view of the possible condemnation I could receive for disclosing who my mother was, I was groomed by Dad to not talk about Mom. Unfortunately, Dad may have inadvertently initiated a response and I had the worst happen; my ex-church leaders condemned me for the mother I had. A mother who’d passed away thirty plus years earlier."
​-McMorlan, K. (2018) "TREASURES In The Trash, Chapter 27 Triggers, Hot-Spots, and Stressors 

In The Trash 

​​The Trunk's Story 

A while ago my phone rang; the woman on the line started to ask me questions concerning who I was related to. I was apprehensive where this conversation was going; Dad’s physiological training about who I belonged to had to be tampered down during this exchange. I was relieved when she finally explained she had my great-grandfather’s trunk and was looking for the rightful owners. I didn’t even know of the trunk’s existence until I received that phone call. 

This previously unknown trunk presented me with photos of a man who crossed the ocean to start a new life. He did so through what I can only assume was a challenging and audacious sea voyage, during the 18th century. I've reasoned my great-grandfather must have exhibited a tenacious personality, and I gained a sense of personal identity and improved  self-esteem .

Dad’s grandfather was disowned by an affluent family, because the story I heard through Dad was: My great-grandfather remained the unwanted bastard child of a prominent family. My dad’s great-grandfather was a fifteen year old boy from a prosperous family, while his great-grandmother was the family’s maid. I’m certain this story had been handed down throughout the generations; I’m of the fourth generation. 

I was also told by Dad, my great-grandfather looked just like his biological father; there was no denying his parentage. Whereas I can only suspect there was much shame, scandal, and disgrace surrounding my great-grandfather’s birth. I furthermore was told when my great-grandfather arrived in America, he tenaciously declared the family name of his biological father as his own. I now know where my obstinate personality comes from!

However, I struggled with thinking errors  because I was  neglected  and  abused  in my childhood. Which led me to believe our family was orphaned. I discovered through the family Bible which was in the trunk, my great-grandparents had seven children who lived to be adults and a few who didn’t. Meanwhile I’ve realized our family wasn’t orphaned, as I was led to believe through Dad's emotional abuse , resulting in PTSD .

This trunk carries much significance to me, as it’s full of prized family photos; it gives me a sense of birthright or citizenship, I gained a personal sense of belonging. I finally found my inner voice , which had been attempting to surface and be discovered in a positive manor.  All the photos inside this trunk present people as having had money, resources, and assets; I came to this conclusion through their clothing choices.

I additionally concluded photos were a luxury in the early 19th century. Family must have been important to my great-grandfather, since there’s so many photos of the family. Photos which had been stored in this old trunk, and I’m only now seeing. This was contradictory to Dad's apparent core beliefs concerning family. 

Through no work of my own, my paternal great-grandfather’s trunk now sits in my living room; my dad’s dad, and his dad’s trunk. My great-grandfather’s name and therefore my maiden name is inscribed with paint on the trunk. Even though faded, after over one hundred and thirty plus years I can clearly see my great-grandfather's name.

It’s also amazing to me how this 30” x 16” x 19” trunk carried all of my great-grandfather’s belongings over the ocean to start his, per say, revival. Whatever would I have chosen?!
"My childhood was hurtful enough but a church hurt leaves lasting detrimental wounds associated with a place of refuge."​

Morlan, K. (2018) "TREASURES in The Trash"